Social Media Detox

I have been meaning to do this post for a while now and I’m not sure what has held me back but I am doing it now.  The whole thing might sound like I am just having a big rant and maybe I am.  I signed up to Facebook many years ago whilst living in Australia, and for me it was a great way to stay connected to my family and friends back home in South Africa.  However, over the years how we use social media has completely changed and I’m at the point where I am kinda getting over it.  To me it seems like now you have to disconnect to actually connect with people.  Make real connections.

Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, Snapchat, you name it, it all just seems to have become a bit competitive.  At one stage I too was a social media addict and posted photos of everything and anything, like seriously who cares what I eat for dinner not many people to be honest.  I eat food just like everyone else.

People just seem so superficial now and that’s just my opinion, you can choose to agree or disagree that’s your choice.  When people post stuff now,  I don’t even know if it’s real, or is it just there so everyone else can think that their lives are just so amazing and awesome, compared to everyone else’s normal lives.  I think it has become a platform for people to show off a bit, look at my kids dressed in “Country Road” clothes or whatever designer wear, seriously I dress my kids in Warehouse, Kmart or Cotton on and even hand me downs, really whats the point dressing them up in expensive stuff when they grow so fast!

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If you look at your “friends” on Facebook, how many of them are truly your friends, and when was the last time you actually spoke to any of them?  I know there are some that I have not spoken to in years!  Every so often I go and do a clean out of who I actually share things with and now I am going to do an even bigger clean out, please don’t be offended if I remove you, it’s nothing personal, but if we haven’t engaged in a long time then it makes sense.

Here’s a great little video that you should watch!  Can We Auto-Correct Humanity?

I think there is definitely a place for Facebook, it can be very good for community pages, businesses, support groups, school groups.  Those are exceptionally useful.

Instagram holy moly, I mean there were days that I spent ages trying to bloody do a flat lay photo, or raid the house for black and white stuff so I could do a monochrome photo. It all has just become far to time consuming.  Again, these little tiles of square can sometimes get you feeling a bit down, because you look at other people’s feed’s and think wow look at the stuff they have or the places they go (admit it you feel that way too, it’s called being human), but then reality slaps you in the face, and reminds you once again, it’s all styled and edited.  We cannot go through life with everything being styled or in the perfect light, and don’t get me started about Instagram stories and Snapchat…for fucks sake, like seriously, how long do some of these people spend recording themselves talk???

Imagine, if people actually didn’t spend hours looking at themselves talk all day about what they are doing, and how they wish their hair was straighter or had more body, or about them getting their eyebrows feathered.  They will be astounded at the amount of spare time they have up their sleeves, try it people you might be surprised.

The worst one is when people are out walking/exercising and they are videoing themselves talking for such a long time and I think to myself, have they ever thought what they look like to onlookers, here they are walking holding a phone out in front of them talking!  It’s fucking hilarious and ridiculous.  I am so sick of seeing people constantly going on about all the packages that are arriving at their doorsteps, I got a few things given to me to promote by brands, but I am so glad I don’t get a shit load of stuff, because quite frankly I can’t be arsed. There are some people who spend all day running from one PR event to another, it’s just crazy to me, but hey they love it and so that’s their thing.

It sort of all came to me when I was at Adele’s concert and I was standing there in the rain and spending so much time taking videos of her singing, and I am watching her through my phone screen.  I thought to myself like seriously what the hell is wrong with me, I didn’t pay $150 to watch Adele through my phone screen.  I put my phone away and was completely present, and I sang and danced with my daughter for the rest of the time.

I have slowly stopped posting much on Instagram and yes I might have lost some followers but I am at the point now where I don’t really care, I don’t post much on my private Facebook account now either, because I want my life to be mine, and not for everyone else to have a look in on.

Instead now I spend more time reading, listening to music, and dancing it out with my girls!

Happy detoxing!

Ronell x

 

 

 

Beauty & The Beast

Last night was family movie night. Initially it was just going to be myself and Kiara who’s 10. I was sitting on the fence about whether Chloe who’s 6 would be too little to watch it.  In the end we thought stuff it we will all go and watch it, much to Chloe’s delight. 


The movie was amazing! We loved all the singing and dancing in it. I think Emma Watson who played Belle was perfect for the role. I also loved Mrs Pots & Chip. Now the Beast well I’m not so sure about that. I think everyone held their breath when the spell was broken and the prince was relieved. 

I think he looked a bit too clean if that makes sense. He should have had a beard or a bit of stubble or something.  I found him more attractive when he was a beast rather than the prince! Is that weird? 

There are a couple of scary bits but not too bad. Our girls were okay with it they just covered their eyes a bit. 

This movie was one of my favourite Disney movies growing up, and I’m so pleased I got to watch this with my girls. 

All in all we loved it! 


Hope you enjoy it as much as us!

Ronell x

The Bachelor NZ – My Take on it!

This is now the 3rd season of the bachelor that we have had here in NZ.  Season 1 set the bar pretty high, however, it seem’s since then standards have just gone down hill.  Art Green is still by far my fave bachelor.  When I say standards have dropped I’m mainly referring to the girls and possibly a bit with the main guy himself too just a little.

Watching the first episode was just cringe worthy!  Firstly it wasn’t even like a double episode or anything which was a let down.  The girls I must say are beautiful, but some of them, actually most of them come across as being very immature and not that bright either.  The way they were all chomping at the bit on the first episode about “interrupting” they were behaving like hyenas.  I was like, “calm the fuck down girls, and pull yourselves together”.  Who knows maybe being in a fish bowl situation it’s pushing them to act out of character. But geez!!!

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Now the Bachelor himself, I think it’s great that they have found someone who is just a regular guy, he’s not a millionaire (not that there are many eligible one’s in NZ), he isn’t an entrepreneur who is going to then boost his business by being on the show and he isn’t a douche bag (aka Jordan season 2).  He’s just a good guy who is passionate about his job.  He come’s across as really down to earth and genuine but I must say I find him very awkward. Just odd thing’s like hand gestures and on the dates, it’s so obvious when he is going to give the girl a rose because you can see his arm just hanging down low and holding it in his hands.  Not smooth at all!  I just wish he was more of a manly man, if you know what I mean.  He come’s across as really shy and he may be different if it was outside of the show, I suppose when everything is produced and you’re told what to do etc, it is a bit unnatural.  Hopefully as the episodes go on he relaxes a bit more.

The girls should be told that one of The Bachelor 101’s of what not to do is, complain to the guy about how all the other girls are being catty and bitchy etc, it just’s makes you look like an idiot. Yes I’m talking about you Katey!  Grow up!!!

The date’s are painful to watch because they just seem so unnatural and rehearsed, and when he says, “he’s put together something special”, does he actually have a say in what the dates are or helps plan them, or is it all just organised and get’s told this is what you’re doing.

My favourites are Viarni & Bel, so I’m keeping my fingers crossed.  Even though it is painful to watch, it’s one of those things that because it’s so bad you cant help but watch.

At the end of the day it’s not easy putting yourself out there and hat’s off to the girls.  Everyone will have their opinions good or bad, let’s just hope whoever end’s up at the end, they truly love each other and it last’s.

Ronell x

Clip n Climb – North Shore

Every parent knows this scenario well! It’s the weekend and is pissing down with rain, the kids are fighting with each other or bored or who knows what! We parents are thinking, “Please god save us!” 

Well we were saved this weekend that has just gone by. Auckland received one of its heaviest downpours, however we braced the weather and took the girls to the new Clip N Climb in Albany, North Shore. 

The set up was pretty amazing. At the entrance you will find a huge picture showing the height of some of the tallest mountains in the world. 


Once we entered the girls were quickly and efficiently harnessed up and were ready to go. But before climbing you are taken through a quick safety briefing which the guys make pretty fun for the kids. 


The girls got to climb for an hour. There were so many different walls for them to try out they loved it. We went to the first session in the morning so it was pretty empty however it does not take long to fill up. It’s also a very popular party destination. 


They did so well it took them a few times before they worked up the courage to go all the way to the top. I bet it isn’t easy either! I’m yet to give it a go myself! 

The girls cooled off afterwards with a well deserved ice cream! It’s fair to say we had a quiet afternoon as they were pretty tired from all the climbing. It’s a win win situation! 

If you would like more information about Clip n Climb check out their website here. 

Clip n Climb North Shore
Happy climbing! 

Ronell x

The Slow Dance of Marriage

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Today is our 14 year wedding anniversary.  14 years!!!!  I sometimes sit and think wow I can’t believe that we made it so far!  When we got married back in 2003 we were still really young, I was 21 and Adam was 23, we dated for almost 2 years before we were married. Prior to being married we didn’t live together, we were both still living at home.  So we knew being married was going to be a huge learning curve, especially sharing the same space!  Luckily for me, he is a bit of a neat freak too, thank goodness for that! Also we were blending two very different cultures so there was a lot of give and take that had to happen.

In the beginning we stepped on each others toes a lot, as you do, and it took us a few years to actually find our rhythm, but even now we stumble a few times.  Three years after being married we had our first child, and having children well that’s when the strength of a marriage is really put to its test. It definitely wasn’t smooth sailing, there were times when I wanted to just leave and even though Adam won’t admit it, I’m sure he too felt like that at times, but somehow we managed to dig deep and get through all the hard times, and we all know those hard times come and go as we go through the different phases of our lives.  We both have amazing role models in our parents who have being married for over 30 years respectively, and who are always there to help us whenever we need advice to this day.

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It’s now that I realise marriage is not the tango or the tempo, to last the distance it has to be a slow dance. I am the hot-headed one in our relationship (my family are probably reading this and nodding!) and Adam is the calm and cool one, which is great because we balance each other out, god help us if we were both hot headed, I probably wouldn’t be writing this.  I may have thrown and orange or two over the past 14 years! However, we have taught each other so many things over the years, and when I look back we have achieved so much together in such a short amount of time, and I am super proud of us both.

It’s important for us to celebrate each other as with life and parenthood we usually forget and everything else takes priority.  So to my dear husband there are a few things I would like to thank you for (it might be a bit cheesy but I don’t care).

Thank you for being my rock and safe haven.  No matter how hard life got at times you were there to lift me up.

Thank you for running to the supermarket and buying me tampons/pads when I run out (just to clarify this doesn’t happen often).

Thank you for always giving me your last cheese and cracker on your plate even though I know you probably don’t want to.

Thank you for fulfilling my crazy need of adventure and driving to all sorts of places (which I know you secretly love to).

Thank you for always making me a cup of tea at the end of the day when the kids are gone to bed, I don’t even have to ask and it’s there waiting.

Thank you for working so hard and achieving so much in your career, enabling me to stay at home and raise our two girls.  We are very proud of you.

Thank you for recognising when I need time out for myself and making it happen.

Thank you for being the best dad our girls can ever have.

The list can truly go on and on, so I wont bore you.  We don’t have the perfect marriage, and I don’t know if there ever is such a thing, but we definitely work hard on our marriage and relationship and it’s what got us here so far. We both respect each other tremendously and know that each of us have opinions and views on all sorts of topics be it, news, family, friends or life in general, so it’s important to listen and communicate, and it’s something we have worked on from the start.

I am so blessed to have an amazing relationship with my husband, and I look forward to seeing where the years ahead take us.

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Ronell x

 

I’m A Tidy Person & Make No Apologies For It!

Mmmm….I’ve been thinking about this for a few days after hearing something on social media.  Another mum made a comment saying, that people who have clean immaculate houses are just not real people and that it could just be a persona for social media, compared to her house which she claimed to be a tip!  It was a general comment not made to anyone specifically.

Well this rubbed me the wrong way because I am a very tidy person, I clean my house every single day, and you can drop in any time and it will always look the same, tidy! I never have stuff lying around on every surface of my house, everything has a place, and you know what I am real! This is who I am this is what I do.  I’m not doing it to show off or impress anyone else, I’m doing it for me.  I am an organised person and my house is the same.  Having a tidy house gives me a sense of calmness and I find I’m not so stressed.

I’m just so sick of the word “real” being thrown around for every single thing.  If someone chooses to have a clean house then good on them, if it’s not a priority for other’s then that’s okay too.  The hashtag #Mumlife doesn’t necessarily mean a messy house, grubby kids and baked beans on toast for dinner. Why do we always glorify the not so pretty side and for those that make an effort with their home and food etc why isn’t that “mumlife?”.  There are night’s when we have baked beans on toast but it’s not every night. Everyone lives by different standards, which should be accepted and not put down.

I have two girls and for me it’s important that one of the many things I teach them is how to keep a house clean and tidy, how to cook etc, so one day when they venture off, they will have been taught how to look after themselves and the places they live in.  It’s something that I choose to teach them, it doesn’t mean everyone has to teach their kids the same thing I’m doing. Life isn’t one size fits all. 

I have anxiety issues, and if things in my life aren’t in order or tidy it effects me, so I always plan everything meticulously and I clean the house a lot, but as crazy as it sounds I actually enjoy cleaning.

I’m not a stepford wife, I do have day’s where I really can’t be bothered with cleaning or cooking and if the house is somewhat clean then that will do. There are days where I will sit down and watch a movie or catch up on some of my shows (that seem to take up all the space on the planner as I never get a chance to watch it).

So please don’t judge or label other mum’s no matter how they choose to live their lives.  I will never apologise for having a tidy house!

Ronell x

 

Soaking up some Sunshine

On Friday Auckland really turned the weather on, it was a perfect summers day. I got on my exercise gear and instead of doing my usual neighbourhood walk I headed to Milford Beach. I’ve always wanted to do the Milford Beach to Takapuna Beach walk so here I am. 


The walk runs along the shore line and over lots of rocks and narrow pathways. Some of the rocks can be slippery as well so good walking shoes is required. Also make sure you walk this when it’s low tide and definitely not when it’s hide tide or during storms (obviously). 


There are moments when I found myself getting a little wet but not too bad! There are lots of dogs around at both beaches before 10am and after 6pm during daylight savings. They are leash free as well. So I power walked whenever I was near any wet dogs!!! Except one very big dog decided to run up to me, to which I almost jumped into the water for an ocean swim!! Luckily he was called away. 


As I mentioned there are bits that are very narrow so you need good footing. This walk is definitely not suited for young children, prams etc I had my headphones on but never actually listened to my music, it was so good just taking in the sights. 


During parts of the walk you do go over private property so you need to be a bit mindful and respectful of this. I think it’s great that the owners allow it. The houses along the coast line were amazing. 


There were a few clouds threatening rain but they held off thank goodness. I found myself looking at my watch a couple of times and thinking about everything I had to do at home. But then I just said to myself screw it, it can all wait. It’s so important during this crazy holiday season that we don’t get caught up in the mad rush and instead take time out to destress and just do something that’s good for the soul. 


I walked all the way to Takapuna Beach Cafe and Store, grabbed a coffee and sat down for a little bit before heading back to Milford Beach. 


Definitely put this on your list of walks to do and make the most of this amazing weather. 

Enjoy

Ronell x